Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
