so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
