yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
