Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Randomize
