i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
