About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
