ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
