whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
