I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Randomize
