Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
