I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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