weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
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