I cockslap morals
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
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