clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
