did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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