found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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