i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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