Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
MIDGETS
????
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
