I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
