let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
