I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
