fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
