hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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