So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
