I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
We're too hungover to prance.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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