no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
