from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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