Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Never underestimate the power of titties
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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