yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
