Just cropdusted the office
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Vodka?
Forever.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
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