doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
