I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
