What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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