We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
