so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
