I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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