I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
operation harelip BJ is a go
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
