Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
