Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
