I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I just found a bag of teeth...
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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