i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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