first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
