I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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