are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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