Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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