she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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