I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
When are your genitals available?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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