I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
