Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
