Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize