Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
