Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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