is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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